By Kapil Tiwari
Sagar : In interior Bundelkhand, where life seems steeped in superstitious beliefs, a fresh whiff of air is permeating through its villages like Mahuna Kayasth, Khajra Harchand, Niratla, Dungasra, Chapri Sagouni, Bissraha, Mahuna Jat, Dalpatpur, Tilapari and Jagdish Bamhori. Breaking age-old taboos like Parag, Laloi villagers decided to take matters in their own hands and conducted the marriage of a tribal girl from a neighbouring village after 17 years, deviating from the superstitious belief system.
Parag is a sanction imposed on a village to not conduct any weddings if a grave crime like murder or cow slaughter took place, until the person responsible—or their family— undertakes a pilgrimage, performs a symbolic Tulsi-Saligram marriage, and hosts a community feast. For affluent families, this was possible. But for the poor, it meant keeping girls unmarried for long, may be lifelong.
According to elders, the Parag rule was formulated to deter crime but it affected the vulnerable young women from poor families who did not have the means to go out to some other village to solemnise the wedding.
Hundreds of girls across Bundelkhand are still waiting for a wedding as their villages have not been allowed to conduct any event.
But Laloi village in Malathoun block of Sagar district broke the ban in a unique way. A village where no wedding had taken place for 17 years following a murder, the sarpanch Badal Singh decided enough was enough. In consultation with elders and villagers, he found a solution - to bring a bride from outside and host the wedding in Laloi village, and to symbolically end the Parag ban.
Manasi Gaud, a young girl from a poor tribal family, was married to a groom from Narsinghgarh in Damoh district and the entire village contributed Rs 3 lakh to host the wedding, as if it was a gesture of collective redemption. When the baraat (wedding procession) entered Laloi, the village celebrated like never before. There were sounds of drums and music of the shehnai - and people rejoiced.
The event was attended by local MLA and former Home Minister Bhupendra Singh. “It’ is an irony that we worship girls as goddesses and still believe in superstitions that do not have any basis or logic and affects them the most. It is time our society abandons such regressive practices and gives our future generations a healthy future,” he said.
Dr. Diwakar Singh Rajput, head of the Sociology and Social Work department at Sagar University, explains that such practices usually have a well-meaning intention. “Traditions like Parag were once a way to discourage serious crimes. The purpose was to ensure collective punishment which was like self policing. But over time, such customs turned negative affecting many girls and women,” he said.
Stating that the present-day outcomes of Parag like customs are deeply problematic, he added that such sanctions cause undue suffering and particularly those who had no part in the crime end up paying the heaviest price.
Laloi’s bold step has set a precedent for other villages where Parag exists. "Every old custom and rituals can be reinterpreted, even rewritten, through collective will and empathy," said the sarpanch.
Read More
