Hungry For Love: Mothers Left To Walk Alone As Those Who Walked Holding Their Hands Look The Other Way
When the world was celebrating Mother's Day, elderly women in a city old age home were remembering their children who chose to abandon them.
Published : May 13, 2025 at 1:02 PM IST
By Bikash Kumar Das
Bhubaneswar: In a quiet room, lying down on a durri, Sandhya Pal is immersed in thoughts. Try decoding her by sitting next to her and she gets up wiping her moist eyes. No complaints, no regrets, just fleeting moments bring alive all her emotions of being left alone at a time when she should have been spending time with the family. The last two years have been emotionally draining for her even when she is surrounded by many of her ilk at an old age home in the capital city of Odisha.
Sandhya Pal is not alone undergoing this emotional angst. There are many others who have been forced to loneliness and some who chose to stay away from children to avoid unnecessary squabbles.
"When I gave birth to my son and daughter, I faced a lot of problems. From raising them up to making them stand on their own feet, I made sure they have a good upbringing. Unfortunately, I lost my son in 2023 when I was in the old age home. I always feel his absence," reminisces Sandhya, 71, from Bhadrak district in Odisha. The only regret she has is that her son died when she was at the old age home and none informed her. "My daughter and son in-law come to see me at times and that is all I have as family connect. Now I do not have any reason to go home since I have none there to call my own," says she, with a passing remark that those at home do not need her.
The Krishna Old Age home near Dhauligiri in Bhubaneswar has been a home to many such women, who spend time only remembering their children. They have the company of other inmates and get all that they need to lead a dignified life but deprived of love, they speak in the language of tears more than words.
Seventy-five-year-old Kadambini Patnaik, a resident of Kalinga Vihar area, has accepted the old age home as her own ever since she was made to move out of her own house. Still, she says she misses her son. "Motherhood is such that even when children forget, we do not. Everyday I miss my son but I am not sure if my son ever thinks of me. The bond of a child and mother begins in the womb so it is not easy to leave the children when we grow old," she argues even when she has been left alone. Kadambini also says that every day is mother's day "Because I do not think there is any day in the life of a mother when she does not remember her children. Can a single day celebrate a mother or her sacrifice. Every mother does what none else can with so much unconditionality."
Refusing to speak anything about her children, Kamalini Das, 67, from Bhadrak limits her conversation with ETV Bharat to her mother and brothers. "Had my mother been alive, I would not have been here. My brothers too do not have the desire to take me back but I hope, one day they will realise their mistake. I look forward to go to my parents' house," she says. Living in the old age home for the last two years, Kamalini speaks to her family members at times over phone. "I think I have done my duty by raising my children and now it is up to them if they want to care for me. I cannot force people to accept me," she says in a sad tone.
Among the inmates, 80-year-old Basanti Patra could not stop crying when ETV Bharat asked her about life in the old age home. "Despite financial hardships I took care of my children and raised them but it is sad that I have been separated today and live here," says Basanti breaking down. As she wipes her tears, she stares blankly at the windowsill. "I still cannot fathom what sin did I do to have such a life when am aged. I miss my son badly," she adds hiding her face with the saree pallu.
Rajesh Mohapatra, the founder of Krishna Old Age Home consoled Basanti by assuring that she has a son in him. "I am your son, I am happy that I have so many mothers apart from my biological mother," he convinces her. As Basanti gathers composure, Rajesh says, such scenes happen every other day. "Someone or the other breaks down. Women are at times very fragile when it comes to their children particularly. We try our best to make them feel wanted and give them reasons to involve with other inmates through discussions and other activities. But the hurt cannot be taken away from them," he explains.
With lunch being served, most inmates of the home left to have their share, while some wanted to be left alone for some time. "I do not think mothers can be ignored and those who do, are ignorant how valuable is the one who brought them to this world and made them live," he concludes coaxing the inmates to have food.
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